We Have To Orchestrate Our Own Comeback Story
Whitney was out of control, that girl, America’s Diva, exploded in front of all of us. I shook my head, oh, girl, I have been there. You know what I am talking about, right? A catastrophic meltdown. Remember, when Whitney was on that reality show, Being Bobby Brown, with her drug crazed husband and she was filmed screaming ‘Kiss My Ass’ (click here to watch). That was just one of many public and later drug filled meltdowns.
I know I have had my meltdowns, just ask Bill, he loves to tell the story of when we owned the Bed and Breakfast in Sacramento, CA. I had spent thousands of dollars on a whole house music system. At the time, I was loving my Phentermine weight loss diet, popping those pills like they were candy and the weight just fell off. I only ate Skittles and Gummy Bears and drank mass quantities of water. I had energy galore and yes my emotions were tinged with a little rage, nothing I could not handle.
Until, after painstaking shopping for 30 or so CD’s of zen like music to accompany the urban hip feel of our Inn and Spa, our employees were carelessly stacking the CD’s on top of the player and not filing them back in their correct case. Time after time I would go into the office and organize the music and they would be strewn all over the place the next day.
It all culminated in a screaming match with Bill, where I really was irrational and raged at Bill as I grabbed the stack of 30 ZEN CD’s and sent them crashing to the ground. I wanted the offending employees fired. The moment was an epiphany of calm and karma as the most recent version of Buddha Lounge flew across the floor!
I am sugar-coating my Phentermine meltdown, it wasn’t just this one incident, it was a few months worth of crazy, but damn, I looked good and I could work for hours and the only by-product was rage. Hell I could live with that. The problem is, no one else could!
I imagine that living on crack is a lot like living on Phentermine and watching Whitney self-destruct is fascinating, because we all have the ability to self-destruct. We are frail and insecure and we all fail and make mistakes.
Last night I watched with wonder as Whitney sang, “I look to You” with Kim Burrel, of course Bill was his typical hard ass on her judging her a fraud, but I saw a come back and it warmed my soul. Whitney’s public performance last year in Korea had revealed a voice that had been shattered and lost. Her hard partying life appeared to have destroyed a London that attracted boos.
Whitney’s voiced has been restored and the girl is making a mighty fine comeback. Comebacks are not easy, in fact my Phentermine meltdown was easy to get over. I simply had to stop taking the pill, of course existing on a diet of Skittles and Gummy Bears had to go, but my emotions calmed down and I return to the normal big personality that I usually have minus the rage and flights of fantasy.
We all deserve a come back! I mean look at me last summer, that was actually a meltdown that was way worse than my diet pill popping days. It seemed the only place I could find happiness was through food. The more my life felt like it was spinning out of my control, the more I ate. I would wake-up driving through McDonald’s getting a breakfast burrito and go to sleep after eating three dinners.
This is my comeback! I have orchestrated it for myself, to get my life back under control and to take it away from food. Last night I added a 30 minute swim to my 90 minutes of Bikram Yoga and it felt great!
Of course I did not wear a Speedo, at the gym, which is my preference for swimming laps. I simply do not like the drag of board shorts, but at my size wearing a Speedo is even more uncomfortable than wearing yoga shorts. At the yoga studio we all wear yoga clothes, at the gym, them manly men are to shy to wear them and so was I, but give me 10 pounds and I will strap one on.
So yes, we all love a comeback story, why not write one of our own! Be the star in our own life that comes back and inspires others!
I am going to tell you that writing your own comeback story is going to be HARD!!!!!
There are no easy road maps to follow and we all have to find what works for us. For me it is simple, I needed to develop a daily regimen to follow. Something that would be easy to follow and some thing I could commit to.
Today is going to be day 37 of my 60 Day Challenge at the local Bikram Yoga Studio in Minneapolis, MN. When I started the 60 Day Challenge I did not think I would be able to do 60 days in a row, in fact I played with only doing a 30 Day Challenge. But I was sick and tired of being sick and tired. I needed to commit to something tough and this is a tough commitment.
My comeback started with the following steps:
1. Recognition of the problem: I knew I was a fat ass and that my body was falling apart with every bite I took and every step seemed more difficult.
2. Get Moving: I believed that I needed to start moving before I could start eating correctly, so I started doing yoga! I was moving with no impact but was moving and that is a place to start.
3. Quit Smoking: Did it cold turkey, it was killing me and stealing my motivation and my breath.
4. Eat Right: I looked for a way to eat that addressed my issues from blood sugar to blood pressure. I needed a meal plan I could follow easily and quickly.
5. Make a Plan: I made a plan to start moving, then start eating, then I added an extreme commitment, one that has a calendar for me to mark off each day I complete.
6. Stick to the plan: No matter what I go to yoga…..NO EXCUSES! I am not flexible, it is hot, it is like HELL! Sometimes I hate it, but I always feel better and get a yoga high after class!
There is something about my ability to commit to this 60 Day Challenge that has changed me. I wish I could explain it. It is like I have been empowered to be the best me I can be and nothing is going to stand in my way! Nothing!!!!!
When you find that commitment in yourself, you will be ready to really live. I was a processed food zombie last month and last year. I am not a zombie anymore. Are you ready to leave ZOMBIE LAND and live?
Hear and watch Whitney’s Solo Comeback of “I Look To You” I am sure she is singing about God and when you look into her eyes, you can see a gleam of happiness. I hope I have that same gleam. For me, I find my spiritual strength inside me and I hope it is radiating from me. I hope that you find your spiritual strength and the power of your comback and live life in the fullnes of joy!
If you are share with me your plan below in the comments section! I want to hear about it!
The Fat Yogi 